Greetings to you Santa Claus!
May I just say right up front that it was NOT my idea to put on a Santa hat. While the red is a very nice accessory and goes with my beautiful, true black hair, the hat style – it just isn’t me. I’m thinking more feather boa, or a grand, wide-brimmed hat. I may be a big girl, but I have my dignity, and am extremely feminine.
Now then, Santa, I have been waiting in line at the Santa Help Desk Center for days. Disgraceful customer service. Be that as it may, I will report to you that in general my attitude towards life is exceptional (I just truly hate waiting in lines). I have a sunny disposition, a healthy appetite, and I look after the smaller animals here. Santa, you might not know but underneath my strong, womanly, muscular body I am very sensitive. I am the only cow here that cries. That’s right, I cry sometimes when I’m very sad, like when my beautiful and sweet Kimiko died. I was sad for a long time.
Now then Santa, I have a complaint and a request: my complaint is that the volunteers and visitors, at this time of year, have terribly cold hands. They come up to me and say, “Oh, Brandy, you’re so big and warm, let me put my freezing cold hands on your warm fur.” Nice for them, but they are transferring all their cold-handed molecules right over to me. It’s not right, Santa. Please send these kids some hand warmers! For me? Next, is a request. I put a lot of pressure on my feet, and sometimes my toes get rather long. Nothing that requires the man with the great cow-tipping machine and his hoof knives to come out (Lordy, but that gave me a scare!). But once in a while I just need a bit of nail filing. This smaller rasp should do quite well for me. I suppose I might share it with the goats, sometimes, too, although I am personally more of a sheep girl than a goat girl, don’t you know.
Santa, if you promise that they won’t have cold hands, would you send me a sponsor? It’s quite grand having a sponsor. I know I’m kind of an expensive girl to sponsor, but I eat an awful lot. They put out 2-3 of those 800 pound hay bales a week and, well, I do my part to take care of them!
Oh, thank goodness I finally got to the head of the line to write you and I do hope that you’re getting paid overtime for all this extra work you’re having to do this year. You make a lot of people and animals happy, dear Santa.
P.S. Thank you for finally sending me some horse friends. I LOVE horses so much.
Star Gazing Farm
16760 Whites Store Road
Boyds, MD 20841