Animal News: The Chronicles of Newman and other Stories
Newman Learns a Thing or Two
September 3, 2003
August was a very eventful month for Newman. After recovering from the terrible Attack of the Hornets (Newman angered a hornet's nest and received over 20 stings), Newman decided to acquire some new skills.
First on the list was, I believe, to be more helpful to me (since I
was the one who bathed his wounds). This found expression in his
apparent ability to sign for UPS packages. One day there was a
package delivery from UPS on my front steps. When I arrived home
Newman was standing on the steps, all alone, with the package. It had
clearly been "tasted" but was still intact. In bold letters on the top of the package
it was written "must be signed for". This may have been the first time
a hoof print was accepted as a legal signature, but fortunately we
didn't receive any complaints from the company.
Enough of being helpful. Boredom set in some time around mid-August,
and Newman, observant beast that he is, realized that opening the
truck door was probably a task that goats could master. He is a "car
guy" at any rate, jumping into any vehicle a hapless visitor might
have innocently left open. But this new trick was nothing short of
entrepreneurial. He has, to date, opened and occupied my truck half a
dozen times, eating whatever contents (including bills and the ADC
map) were left behind, and sometimes turning on the headlights if it
happens to be nighttime. On one unfortunate occasion he locked
himself in, but alerted me to this fact by sitting on the horn.
Today, August 31, we completed the construction of the goat-proof roof
on the run in shed, and Newman celebrated by jumping up, and butting
me off. All in all this has been a good month for Mr. Newman Goat,
and we really cannot even begin to think what he may concoct for September.
Until next time,
Farmer Anne
Star Gazing Farm
http://www.stargazingfarm.org
© 2004 Star Gazing Farm, All Rights Reserved
May not be reproduced without permission.
To subscribe to The Chronicles of Newman (and other stories) and to receive news bulletins from Star Gazing Farm, send a blank message to news-subscribe@stargazingfarm.org.
