Farmer Anne Falls in a Ditch
Exclusive Interview
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Broken fence of No Goat Zone |
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Farmer Anne operating the ditch witch/backhoe |
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Trying to patch the broken well connectors |
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Busted nose from falling into 3 foot ditch. |
News Reporter: Farmer Anne, I understand that you fell in a ditch yesterday? That is quite an event. Would you like to tell us about it?
Farmer Anne: No.
NR: Is it true that you busted your nose?
FA: Growl.
NR: Well, I see that you tore out two of your primary fence posts for the No Goat Zone, including the one for the gate. Might make it hard to keep those goats out, no won't it?
FA: Go away.
NR: Is that you operating that big machine? What's it called?
FA: That's a ditch witch. It's like a mammoth sized chain saw that cuts through the ground.
NR: Oh, so that's how you managed to cut right through your well line.
FA: It was the other guy's fault. He didn't measure where the well line came into the house.
NR: What did he say when the water came spurting out of the ground.
FA: He said, "oops".
NR: Good thing his friend was a plumber.
FA: Yes, the guy did at least patch the torn pipes, but all the sludge built up in the well and the professional plumbers have been here for 3 hours trying to get it cleaned out.
NR: So what do your animals think about this?
FA: Aside from the fact that they're locked in the 1/4 acre pasture with no access to the barn and only the little bit of water I can drag out to them?
NR: I expect sheep deal with hardship better than you do?
FA: Growl.
NR: Ah, Farmer Anne when do you think you might be able to shower again?
... no response but a hairy eyeball
NR: So, this was an all volunteer job was it not?
FA: Yes, but it's going to cost twice what it would have if the professionals had just come in and done it right the first time. And that's not including fixing the fence and gate to the No Goat Zone.
NR: What was the project?
FA: This was a project to install a water hydrant up at the barn so that I don't have to lug water buckets from inside the house when the spigots and hoses freeze.
NR: Very interesting.
FA: Actually, it's not. But it's even less interesting hauling water buckets. Perhaps I could invite you to help out here....
NR: I think I'll just wait until the water hydrant is done. Any estimate on when the project might come to fruition?
NR: Farmer Anne? Oh, Farmer Anne? (I think she walked away).
Well, folks, that's the news from Star Gazing Farm today, where the goats butt, the humans bite, and there's always someone clueless trying to get in on the action!
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